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JUNE IN JAVA

JAKARTA - 4th of June - 14:14


Looking over Indo’s capital on the hostel’s roof, I engaged in conversation with Melissa - initially in English, but swiftly discerned from her accent that she came all the way from the Netherlands. Her sunglasses dulled the vivid bright blue of her eyes. I always find sunglasses a barrier between the connection of oneself with the outer world.


"Do you sense it too, the gentle touch of tropical raindrops? It seems a storm is on its way. But you know, I’m fine here," she remarked. I chuckled, for she seemed to grasp my thoughts effortlessly. "Isn't it peculiar how we often despise the rain back home, yet find solace in it when viewed from a different angle?", I answered.


We shared a smile, acknowledging this truth, as we allowed the rain to soothe the warmth on our ‘first sun’-kissed skin in a moment of quiet understanding.






BATUKARAS - 8th of June - 11:23


The soundless guide whisked us away to Batukaras, a secluded haven on the southern shore. G-Eazy's melodies in the backdrop stirred memories of days gone by. Along a serpentine path, we ascended the emerald-painted slopes of Pangandaran.


A living canvas of ever-shifting scenes unfolded, framed by the Daihatsu’s window. Vibrant hijab’s adorned Muslim women on their motorbikes, twirling in the breeze mirroring Indonesia's tropical blooms. Each one we passed, a brief connection signaled by a gentle ‘toot’. Phew, that was close…


Children, dressed in sea-blue attire, spilled out of school, their laughter trailing in their wake as they trod homeward. It struck me suddenly—how their existence revolves around this place, their world confined to the familiar hillside townie.


Oh, the contrast of worlds. In that moment, a wave of gratitude washed over me, realizing the privilege of liberate wander.




BATUKARAS - 8th of June - 21:08


I find myself tossing in turning in the depths of my bed, my heart still half in Antwerp. It vexes me, for I vowed to immerse myself wholly in MY voyage, shedding the ties that bind me so tightly.


Restless in the blackness of night, I shift onto my belly, attuning to the rhythm of my breath pressing against the mattress - I always do that to soothe myself. When sleep gets interrupted by the constant fluctuations of my mind.


Helena's e-reader casts a soft white glow, a beacon in the solitude. Even unknown she offers a safe haven. With a sigh, I reset. Farewell to the airpods, bearing melodies that echo memories of past love.


The crickets' high-pitched song weaves a melody, the frogs' playful staccato dance around it, and the distant waves' rhythmic ebb  and flow serve as a familiar bass line, gently lulling me into slumber.







BATUKARAS - 9th of June - 22:09


Bolstered by my soft bed, I am serenaded by waves crashing at the black shore, a timeless melody that whispers tales of the sea's eternal symphony.


Those waves that bestowed upon me my first surf during the morning sun, a baptism in the embrace of the aqueous realm of liquid dreams.


Above the mosque's minaret, a waxing crescent moon emerges, a celestial guardian casting a silvery glow upon the golden spire.


A sky, unexpectedly clear, unveils itself, defying the forecast of tempestuous rains, a reminder of nature's whimsical allure.


In a daydream, I am transported to the morning's communion with the Big Blue, that mysterious nature that once instilled fear now cradles me in its boundless hold. Like a tenderhearted mother, she envelops me in her arms, offering trust without hesitation.


I reciprocate a silent prayer of gratitude to her. As Tupai waves me farewell, we part ways after sharing the waves, a cup of coffee and some sugary sweetness.


With patience as my guide I drift into dreams where the sea awaits. A promise of tomorrow's reunion.






ROAD TO YOGYA - 11th of June - 18:27


In times traveling, the road whispers sounds of its own. One of melancholic thrill floating in lingering silence between worlds. A space bridging realms of past and future, where memories and fantasies intertwine.


Leaving behind the languorous days of Batukaras, a haven nestled by the sea, proves a bittersweet endeavor. Yet the promise of return, a beacon shining bright in the future of my birthmonth August. In that coastal haven, my mind paints a portrait of my home to be. For it is crystal clear, I long to be near her. The gentle wind caresses me on sighs of boundless freedom, as the deep waters offers a chance for renewal.


Stepping onto the bubblegum pink Estubus, heart heavy with the weight of anticipation, I bid a temporary farewell to this sanctuary, making space for the mysteries that await, for the stories yet untold.






YOGYAKARTA - 13th of June - 20:53


In the ancient city of Yogya, I meet myself, beyond borders of everyday judgment. Touches of open-heartedness and laughter,  painting me as a portrait of joviality, stirred within me a remarkable reflection.


Am I not used to hide myself behind layers of anxiety, cautiously analyzing others' essences before unveiling my own? Do I not linger in the shadows, a silent observer of energies, waiting for the safety of acceptance before revealing the depths of my being?


Helena noticed: “I haven’t seen you like this before, with the ones you don’t know.” A truth reveiled - one of a hidden lioness within, yearning to roar in unabashed splendor, to bask in the radiance of its own pride, and to show boldly the essence of herself.


“It is maybe, because I am happy now, with being myself ”.


I wander through the labyrinth of self-discovery. In Yogya, I find myself anew, a traveler in search of the essence of authenticity, embracing the enigma of self with every step taken in the land of existence.







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